Many mammals, like domestic cats, have a whole set of behaviors that allow them to engage in "ritualized aggression" with each other - warning each other off, signaling intent to fight or withdraw - without actually getting into physical combat. In tense interpersonal situations, we often don't realize how much threat energy others are experiencing when we think we are "just voicing our opinions."

Use I-statements to lessen the threat energy packed into You-statements or Declarations: anchor your observations and feedback to what’s coming up for you in your own field of experience: for example, "I’m feeling like this may be an overly complicated approach…" vs "This is too complicated" (or "You’ve made this too complicated"). I-statements by themselves won't keep you out of interpersonal conflict (let alone physical combat) - they're more like a deliberate ritual with our word choice that makes our mind more receptive to the possibility that others will disagree with us.